Also, 60% in General Douche-baggery

I compliment the DNB!

"You are the smartest person I ever dated," I tell him, lovingly.

He pauses for a long moment.

"WHY are you thinking?" I demand.

"I'm trying to make sure you're the smartest person I ever dated, too," he replies. "I mean, I don't want to tell you you are if you're not."

I glare at him.

"I'm pretty sure you are," he tries.

"I am modifying my previous statement," I announce. "You score a 100% in general smartness, but only a 40% in relationship smartness."